Thursday 10 July 2008

Mayfly Time

heat hazes the sky

swallows swoop
lazily across the lake
to catch mayfly

for mayfly
irridescent in the sun
this languid day
is the full eternity
of their lives


Tempo for Totally Optional Prompts

21 comments:

Jenn: said...

There is something very sensual about your choice of words in this poem. All the "L" sounds bring every line together wonderfully. And the image is lovely.

Noah the Great said...

"this languid day
is the full eternity
of their lives"
Amazing!

Anonymous said...

Expressive and thoughtful, a wonderful poem for bringing the mind's eye into focus.

anthonynorth said...

I found that very calming. Lovely.

Anonymous said...

I love this poem, particularly the lines noah picks out. Just a suggestion - would explicitly mentioning on the swallows' longer perspective bring out the the mayflies' short lives even more?

Pauline said...

I like the alliteration - it moves the poem forward but not hurriedly. your few words evoke a strong image

Linda said...

Such a short poem--perfect for a mayfly--but with words to savor and linger over!

Anonymous said...

This feels so summery. You caught the spirit of life in the heat perfectly.

Anonymous said...

a birds eye view of momentary eternity...awesome

Janice Thomson said...

What beautiful reflections on the short life of the beautiful mayfly - I loved this Juliet.

Andy Sewina said...

Great images here - I take it Mayflies don't live very long.

Anonymous said...

Has a nice dreamy feel. Enjoyable! :)

Anonymous said...

A beautiful poem. The last three lines open it up for contemplation of time.

polona said...

wow, wonderful poem, the one to savour like a summer day...
and the relativity of time is stunning, although the imago is only a very small part of a mayfly's life. but it is an essential one...

gautami tripathy said...

Beautifully worded. I liked reading it aloud.

tears trickle slowly

Anonymous said...

You are so talented!

Anonymous said...

terrific title, I like that "mayfly time."

Anonymous said...

Lovely. Thanks for dropping by at the Cafe. Nice to have found you here.

HL said...

as contemplative as a cloud building in warm afternoon.

Anonymous said...

very summery! i like the illiteration and the movement of time--sun lives long, then birds, then the briefness of the mayfly...

puts things into perspective

maitrar said...

Beautiful. I especially like how "Heat hazes the sky" prepares us for the change of focus to a day as an eternity for a mayfly.