Wanted to let you know, that if you put two links in your comment at PT, then it got caught in the SPAM catcher. They will approve later or you can leave one link at a time.
HI Brian Thanks for your comments - your robins are different from ours! Thanks for the advice re Poetry Thursday comments, I hadn't realised that and in fact i have before now posted two links at the same time.... I'll know in future though!
I think your use of lines and spaces is very effective here for setting th e scene and the pace of events in such a way that the reader really feels the suddenness of the splash of colour that brings warmth into the bleak view.
I love this tiny visual slice with so much symbolic impact. I also love the fact that the robin sings wistfully for winter rather than anticipating spring.
I love this! I was waiting for the red - I wanted to be warm so badly (which only means to say you set up the coldness of the poem very well) and then, there he was, all proud! Nice work!
This was very beautiful. Your spare words really capture the landscape and the red really seems a splash of color. I especially liked, "he sings his/wistful end of winter song."
Juliet, I see we passed each other on the same road today. Probably a different robin I think. I like the way you notice robin suddenly, makes the contrast even more stark. rel
This sets up a nice contrast - I had been thinking of large tracts of red with this week's theme, but that small splash of red is very effective. We don't have robins in New Zealand :( - at least, we do, but they are not common, and they are not redbreasted.
Oh I just know just what that looks like - I remember from a working holiday in Britain thirty years ago - a long time ago, but that memory of the robin's red breast and snow, is a vivid one - thanks for a poem that brought it all back. Just beautiful.
We had, several weeks ago, large flocks of robins passing through.
ReplyDeleteI like that you used wistful at the end.
Hi Crafty,
ReplyDeleteBlack, grey, white and then a burst of spring red. Lovely
Rose
xo
Wanted to let you know, that if you put two links in your comment at PT, then it got caught in the SPAM catcher. They will approve later or you can leave one link at a time.
ReplyDeleteHI Brian
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comments - your robins are different from ours! Thanks for the advice re Poetry Thursday comments, I hadn't realised that and in fact i have before now posted two links at the same time.... I'll know in future though!
I think your use of lines and spaces is very effective here for setting th e scene and the pace of events in such a way that the reader really feels the suddenness of the splash of colour that brings warmth into the bleak view.
ReplyDeleteI like the pattern of this, and love the ending!
ReplyDeleteYou've painted another lovely poem here! Cheers, JP
ReplyDeleteI'm experiencing poetry envy.
ReplyDeleteYou've inspired me to try shorter (though I doubt they'll get any sweeter) poems.
I like the colors, spacing, and the single snowflake. Well done.
Red is a lovely colour against the winter gloom, robins and red berries - always welcome. I hope the robin really was singing the last of winter.
ReplyDeleteI like that it's an end of winter song, rather than first of spring, thus keeping the tone. Good job
ReplyDeleteI love this tiny visual slice with so much symbolic impact. I also love the fact that the robin sings wistfully for winter rather than anticipating spring.
ReplyDeleteThis poem makes me smile as I think of the world reawakening in Spring after the long cold winter.
ReplyDeleteThe red robin was a lovely contrast and sign of spring ;)
ReplyDeletewhat a lovely vivid poem!
ReplyDeleteI love this! I was waiting for the red - I wanted to be warm so badly (which only means to say you set up the coldness of the poem very well) and then, there he was, all proud! Nice work!
ReplyDeleteThis was very beautiful. Your spare words really capture the landscape and the red really seems a splash of color. I especially liked, "he sings his/wistful end of winter song."
ReplyDeleteImagery in words - just what a poem should be.
ReplyDeleteI liked the last line as well... it is a perfect little poem!
ReplyDeleteSo colorful! Like candy for the senses!
ReplyDeleteJuliet,
ReplyDeleteI see we passed each other on the same road today. Probably a different robin I think. I like the way you notice robin suddenly, makes the contrast even more stark.
rel
I love the contrast between colours. Very wistful.
ReplyDeleteSound and vision. Nice.
ReplyDeleteNice poem, and I like the late snowflake. Lovely images.
ReplyDeleteThis sets up a nice contrast - I had been thinking of large tracts of red with this week's theme, but that small splash of red is very effective.
ReplyDeleteWe don't have robins in New Zealand :( - at least, we do, but they are not common, and they are not redbreasted.
I appreciate how the red of the robin's breast stands out in the landscape and in your lovely poem.
ReplyDeleteI love all the rhyme and near rhyme you've packed in here:
ReplyDeletesway / grey / snowflake
skies / pride
wistful / winter
And the alliteration, too:
bare / black / branches
red / robin
suddenly / snowflake
puffed / pride
in like a lion; out like a lamb... this sounds about right - thanks for the visual of spotting the first robin of the season
ReplyDeleteOh I just know just what that looks like - I remember from a working holiday in Britain thirty years ago - a long time ago, but that memory of the robin's red breast and snow, is a vivid one - thanks for a poem that brought it all back. Just beautiful.
ReplyDeleteThat solitary line:
ReplyDelete"a late snowflake falls"
That's so effective for me, and so perfectly isolated. I could see that perfect little flake against the grey sky. Love your use of color!
Nice poem. Catches the desire for spring so well. Good use of color too.
ReplyDeleteNo robins spied here yet.
this is beautiful -- very haiku-like. I love the contrasting colors.
ReplyDeleteSuch few words, such vivid images
ReplyDeleteLovely poem! Like the shift from the strom grey skies into the bright red of the robin, the welcome into the colors of Spring!
ReplyDeleteHello!
ReplyDeletethis poem is veri good, thank you
have nice wkend
We just an extraordinarily nice (warmish) day here; it's strange to read about snow!
ReplyDeleteLovely images. The lines move in that slow way a snowflake does. A very tight poem.
So many comments. What else can I say? Ditto to all. Well done.
ReplyDeleteThis is so beautiful. The other day a thrush hopped around on our patio.
ReplyDelete